\0x10The rise of Pinterest happened with all the enthusiasm and violence of a political revolution.
At \0x93first, it was just a handful of girls who were excited about a social network that they could guiltlessly post cupcake photos to.
Their ranks grew rapidly, attracting women with a whole range of hobbies. \0x10Three of these prevailed: cooking, cuddling with baby animals, and making elaborate crafts out of basic hardware supplies.
I was a late adopter. I'll give you that.
At \0x93first, I thought that Pinterest couldn't cater to my specific interests (primarily burritos).
But after my long period of resistance, and during a particularly boring microeconomics class, I \0x93finally clicked through the site.
How To Turn An Old Milk Crate Into A Fully Functioning Microwave Oven! 50 Ways To Hang Empty Picture Frames Around Your Home! 1000 Uses For Salad Tongs!
Before Pinterest, I would have thought there was only one.
My eyes were opened. Before me lay a world of endless possibilities.
\0x10Then the opportunity arose to attend a 'Pinterest Party' that promised croissants and crafts.
This is my opportunity, I thought.
I could start small with the simplest and most reoccurring pin on Pinterest: the friendship bracelet.
It would be my induction into the rough-and tumble world of terrariums and palettes-as-bookshelves.
"How's it going, Lane?" asked the party's hostess, glancing speculatively at my pile of discarded string.
I looked up from frantically trying to free my \0x93 finger from the jumble of knots it had gotten trapped in.
I plastered on a smile and said through gritted teeth, "Just \0x93fine, thanks." It had been going on like this for over 45 minutes.
Her other guests had finished with their bracelets in minutes and had already moved on to upper-level crafts, like making wind chimes out of old car batteries.
Meanwhile, I had already lost feeling in three of five \0x93fingers.
The rainbow-tiered praline-cheesecake croissants I'd eaten weren't sitting well.
\0x10The other girls were casting me looks of pity.
"She can't craft," they said a tone usually reserved for someone who's contracted an incurable illness. "Bless her heart."
I slid quietly out the back door and tossed the mangled results of my friendship bracelet into the \0x93first dumpster I found.
After that humilitating episode, I couldn't show my face in the D.I.Y. and crafts category again.
I was branded now. An outcast. I can no longer \0x93 find joy in the whimsical world of coffee filter wreaths or chalkboard paint.
But I'm not giving up on Pinterest yet - maybe I'll have better luck with cooking.
Editor's note: She didn't.
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