Be Earnest: It's Good For You

Being a product of the Internet generation has made me realize several things about myself.

(Well, many, but this is neither the time nor place for a fetish roundtable.) The main epiphany being I am all about some irony and sarcasm.

And I don't know if that's the way I want to be.

Sure, the guy who always has the witty comeback is great to have around now and again, but is that guy, with his pettiness and sharp jokes, worth being?

I don't know. As I get older, I find myself thinking about the power of earnestness more and more.

For me, it is refreshing to talk to someone who doesn't layer his or her conversation with that's what she said and sarcastic references to supposed bad music.

It's just nice to talk to someone cool enough to be totally and unabashedly his or her own person -- without the shield of sarcasm and irony, because, in most cases, that's what it is -- something to keep other people from seeing the "real" you.

If the faux you is rejected, the you who hates popular music and Michael Bay movies, that's fine, you know that's not really you.

If the "real" you, however, the you that wants to be upfront, honest and forthright, gets rejected, your inner being, your core, your sense of self and identity is being attacked.

So we put on faces and fronts to protect our core. The really brave people are those facing the world with their true selves, with earnestness.

I am afraid to do this -- afraid people won't like earnest Ben.

So I am slacker Ben or Ben who says and does ridiculous things.

For example, I have become that guy in class.

You know, the guy who shows up late, doesn't pay attention and gives the teacher ridiculous, pithy answers.

Sure, being that guy has benefits. Girls find it intriguing.

I get the "that guy is such a rebel, he is relaxed and doesn't give a damn about anything" looks.

That's nice.

But where does it lead?

I ask because I really don't know.

All I know, or think I know, is life between the two extremes -- caring too much and caring too little -- is harsh.

I err on the side of caring too little. I live by the slacker ethos -- don't try so hard, man -- in everything from grades to money to girls to nutrition.

I could cite philosophers and religions and great men to back my claims, but as I go on in life, I realize there is power in telling people how you feel about them, minus the irony and sarcasm.

If you like a girl, tell her.

If you're passionate about something, be proud of your passion.

There is a basic, ground-level, core-of-your-being honesty to that type of earnestness.

It makes us human.