SATIRE | The last humanities professor
In 170 years, Auburn University's only remaining English professor will retire.
In 170 years, Auburn University's only remaining English professor will retire.
Operating fully funded and government-backed, U.S. Immigrations and Customs Enforcement (ICE) is murdering American citizens, as well as detaining children and innocents in broad daylight. This goes beyond simple political affiliations. The divide between right and left is of no concern to ICE. Registered political party did not matter to them when killing Pretti or Good, not to mention their U.S. citizenship. Allegedly, this is of utmost importance to our government's administration.
Despite the University’s seemingly timeless charm, its many name changes illustrate a complex, frenetic history, which reveals just how young Auburn is in the context of its development. Nonetheless, when posterity looks back on history, it invariably finds that its ancestors tolerated — and often approved of — truly unconscionable behavior. Let us be the ones to set them right.
If anyone today were to browse the contents of any news, streaming or podcast platform, it would not be long until some form of true crime media appeared. In our daily lives, we are undeniably surrounded by crime, and know or even experience detrimental effects that these can have. Witnessing the tragedies that happen to friends, family, neighbors and even ourselves is painful. It’s obvious to all of us that horrific crimes and the trauma related to them are nothing to take lightly. So why, then, can we not get enough?
The writing world of the past was full of political commentary, and in today's age, art and music have become a common avenue of political expression. However, while many have swapped typewriters for canvases and microphones, most have lost this in regular dialogue, claiming they're "not a political person." However, in a time of political uncertainty and unrest, we can always fall back on older texts. Langston Hughes' works, “I, Too” and “I Dream a World” both offer guidance on loving our fellow man. While I, myself, am not a poet, I undoubtedly will always have the courage to love my fellow man and accept we're all America.
Saying that you “love yourself” is nearly impossible if you don’t know anything about yourself. What you are essentially doing instead is enabling yourself to be the most convenient version possible.
Let's try and find a moment where the chaos suffices and we can find the long lost peace of mind. Lauryn Hill spoke for all of us when she said she’s “gotta find peace of mind.” Where is the peace of mind? It’s seemingly nowhere. The chaos fills the lungs of world leaders and their spewing spit waters the soil of our moldable minds. Our minds expand with rage against the other side. That rage is oftentimes justified. What could help find peace of mind?
Sometimes, our favorite pieces of art are created by objectionable artists. So how do we square the art that we love so much with the oftentimes unsavory individuals that make it?
Let me preface with: forgive me, Plainsman. I meant not what I said three years ago, on that rainy campus tour of Auburn. I don’t believe my 18-year-old self, who declared journalism’s time of death prematurely, could fathom the metaphorical home I’ve made for myself in journalism’s embrace. The art of journalism is alive in those that keep it so: in my fellow journalists, in each interviewee we come across, in our dear readers. To you all, I say, thank you for bringing a previously undiscovered part of me to life.
After the recent heist at the Louvre, it appears anyone with a ladder and angle grinder can steal some of the most valuable art in the world.
Memories are what make art meaningful. Being able to experience emotion is what makes art meaningful. Being able to open your eyes and breathe brisk autumn air this fall is what makes art meaningful. The world is constantly telling you what makes art meaningful subtly in everyone's day-to-day life.
Art is effort. Art is passion. Art is human. Artificial intelligence is none of these things. The only person that allows you to be an artist is yourself and your own striving towards creative creations. A homogenous pool of bland and uninspired pixels of artificiality can’t express humanity or love – and never will. So, I really hope we can turn around from artificial intelligence "art" before it's too late.
STEM students consistently overlook the arts as a study that is both necessary and worthy in the pursuit of STEM innovation. Here is why that needs to change.
To the Auburn STEM students, 8,132 of which make up the undergraduate Colleges of Engineering and Science and Mathematics alone, artificial intelligence is a terrifying prospect. As AI continues to develop, it will take a new generation of thinkers and scientists to adequately take advantage of these new mechanisms. It is not the end of employment and purpose but a new opportunity to understand the world more deeply.
Starbucks announced its new protein lattes and cold foam that ranges anywhere from 12 to even 36 grams of protein for a single drink. Without focusing on the undeniable importance of protein, it’s safe to say this unanimous obsession speaks to the environment we have collectively created around our bodies and our never-ending fixation with them.
Many say that AI, especially generative AI, is our future; they argue there is no other option but to indulge this new technology, and we as a society are going to fully integrate it within the coming years. If this is true, we must find an eco-friendly way to go about it. As it is right now, AI is a waste of energy and a regurgitation of pre-existing work. We need to do better.
I was terrified to take economics in college after how much I struggled in high school. But so far my experience in Econ 4300 has been surprisingly painless, and is even pleasant at times. So what changed?
While Auburn sets the standard for engineering education, engineers themselves are at the forefront of human innovation. To be at the forefront asks not just “How do we?” but “Should we?” Every question of ethics is an important one, so why then does Auburn University not require aerospace engineers to take an ethics class?
AI is not the next best thing in fashion and art; it's an excuse for companies we adore to once again let us down.
Having grown up in a small town in Alabama, I am incredibly familiar with confederate imagery. Most prominent among these images was the Confederate flag. I've seen entire stores dedicated to this flag. I’ve seen it flapping on the back of lifted trucks and hung in the rooms of friends. As a Black man, it may not come as a surprise that I don’t really get it. When I’ve asked, I’ve always been met with responses that go along the lines of “southern pride” or “heritage over hate.” These reasons have never sat right with me.