Zac Hawkins said he hit rock bottom one night during his freshman year outside Dowdell Hall. No matter how hard he tried, his ex-girlfriend would not come down from her room to talk to him.
The two had broken up earlier that night around 8:30 p.m. on the steps outside the RBD Library. Hawkins said she wanted to establish herself, to get more involved with her sorority and make friends at Auburn.
"I was kind of the opposite," Hawkins said. "I wanted to hang out with her all the time."
According to Hawkins, his life at this point consisted of going to class, hanging out with his then-girlfriend and playing video games.
Hawkins said he played an "unreasonable amount" of video games. At one point he was ranked number one on the global Gears of War leaderboards, playing 9-10 hours every day.
"It was like a job," Hawkins said.
When his girlfriend -- one of the biggest parts of his life -- left him, Hawkins said it hurt.
"I sat [outside her dorm] for 15 minutes, crying, hoping," Hawkins said.
At that point, Paul Stephens, then a senior in mechanical engineering, was passing by and saw Hawkins sitting alone on the steps in the cold. Stephens invited Hawkins to visit the Hill to accompany him and a group of other students who attended First Baptist Church in Opelika for their prayer group.
"I was desperate for friendship, for community, for something," Hawkins said. "So I ended up hopping in the car with this random stranger and going up to the Hill."
While the others played ping pong, Stephens spoke with Hawkins. Stephens gave Hawkins a piece of advice, something Hawkins said changed his life.
"It just hit me, this girl was not a problem," Stephens said. "It was his relationship with God."
Talking to Stephens made Hawkins realize he needed to take his religious faith more seriously. He described his faith as more casual until that point, something he and his family did because it was expected.
"We just went to church because it was the Southern thing to do," Hawkins said.
After his night with Stephens, though, Hawkins said he placed his faith before relationships with other people. Despite dating all through middle and high school and his first semester of college, Hawkins remained single until his senior year.
Instead, he went on mission trips, attended church at First Baptist Opelika and tried to lead a Christian life.
Hawkins said the charitable work helped him socialize more easily with people. Whether he was taking care of someone's kids or fixing a roof, the work pushed him out of his shell. Even if he only said 5-10 words at one time, it was a start.
One of the people he met on a mission trip to Port St. Joe, Florida., was his future wife Carmen Johnson, now a senior in elementary education. Hawkins and Johnson said their conversations on the car trip there helped revitalize Johnson's faith as well.
"Zac has really taught me just what it means to live so selflessly," Johnson said.
Joe Hwang, an Auburn graduate at whose wedding Zac served as best man, said he is glad Hawkins became more active in his faith.
"I can't say too much about his life before he started following Jesus other than that he was lost and living for himself," Hwang said. "I am very blessed and thankful to have a brother in Christ like Zac."
Four years after his conversion, Hawkins is living in Denver, with a bachelor's degree in electrical engineering from Auburn and a new apartment. He and Johnson plan to get married Jan. 3.
Hawkins said he doesn't miss his old life. Though he plays video games against his brother occasionally on visits home, he abstains for the most part.
"I'm sure I could get back into it," Hawkins said. "I've been invited to go play MLG, which is Major League Gaming, in Dallas, Texas; and in Chicago. It's kinda crazy to think I could have spent my whole life playing video games and making money off the sponsors."
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