I hate Cosmopolitan magazine.
I'm just going to get that off my chest right now.
I hate that their most prominent feature is sex-related.
Because that is exactly what the most popular (and most well-recognized) women's magazine should be about - how to properly bang that guy you met five minutes ago in a bar.
I totally want men to think that's what I am most concerned with, that'll make 'em respect me!
What also burns me up is that they tell women the most we can aspire to in life is being sexually-desirable corporate shrews with nice offices and closets full of four-inch Louboutin heels.
Surely that is what my parents want four years of out-of-state tuition checks to go toward ... I'm certain that's JUST what my dad wants for his little Elli Bec.
Also, the photos they put on their covers!
No one ACTUALLY looks like that.
Well I guess there are some who do.
But those beings are known as "celebrities" and they have these things called "stylists" and "personal trainers" and undergo procedures known as "cosmetic surgeries."
And because all that isn't enough, Cosmo airbrushes the photos of their designated goddesses into further states of unnatural attractiveness.
Why don't they just slap an ad on the front and then take the money they used to spend on their cover-pages to pay some interns to walk around telling ordinary women,
"You're ugly and fat and no man will ever love you until you pull one of our top-left corner suggestion moves on him."
I feel bad for women today.
We really do have to be able to everything.
And look utterly flawless while doing it.
It's no longer enough to throw incredible dinner-parties in our spotless homes under the watchful eyes of our cherubic children's portraits.
Now we also have to go out looking smokin' hot and work 40 hours a week at some stylish, intelligent and feminine occupation before coming home and cleaning the house and preparing the food for that dinner party.
Thanks Cosmo for telling women there is no honor in just being a good wife and mother.
Because heaven forbid the only career you desire is working within your home to raise your kids right.
Now, I completely understand people who need two incomes to stay afloat.
But I feel genuinely sorry for women who are needlessly out in the workforce and completely miserable.
Those women who have bought into the lie that you need a fabulous career to be able to lift up your head among other females.
Now, I am not saying that women should not be allowed to have careers, either.
I'm a journalism major and I intend to spend my life writing,
But I don't intend to sacrifice the welfare of my family to do it.
And neither should you.
In my opinion that's a woman's first real priority anyway.
To rear her children and turn that house your rich engineer husband bought for you into a pleasant place to come HOME to.
Because if you don't, who will?
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