In the age of electronics, most errands or opportunities for human connection have also been advancing into the world of technology. In this age, it’s still common for young adults to pursue dating with the intention of marriage. However, there are major factors that might play a part in preventing or supplementing this goal.
Gen Z daters in Alabama have been changing what it means to “date” in the age of technology.
Launching in 2012, Tinder gave Gen Z access to online dating as well as starting a “dating app revolution” in which multiple online dating options have become available to Gen Z daters within the past 12 years. However, the prevalence of these apps has not only supported dating, but they also have enabled hookup culture.
I’ve heard that’s its common to treat dating apps or social media apps like games to meet people just for fun or to acquire “friends with benefits.” Truly, I believe it. I’ve had my fair share of direct messages that have been uncanny just to get my attention instead of seeking a true connection. I get these DMs maybe once or twice every three months and I never reply, but I do find them funny.
Contributed by Brychelle Brooks
Contributed by Brychelle Brooks
I've never really understood "sliding into DMs." I understand taking a jump but typing a message similar to the previous two really makes you think someone typed this and said, "this'll work." I also frequently question the point of dating apps, and getting messages like this just makes me question their point further.
While I don’t delve into dating apps, I do have friends that have met their significant other — or multiple ex-significant others — through dating apps. While some of their relationships are still going strong, I’ve noticed that others burn out quickly. Not having a true connection is also something that Gen Z has seemed to experience from dating apps.
Across America, 22.93% of app users have been dropping dating apps due to relationship superficiality, and in Alabama, 14.29% of users have expressed this same concern. Similarly, I’ve known people who use dating apps solely for validation.
It’s gotten so bad that multiple pages on Instagram have installments called “Tinder Tuesday,” in which followers send in their DMs from Tinder and other dating platforms and followers see how low the bar is for dating, as well as how treatment of dating has changed in this age.
Whatever the reason is for using dating apps, it seems that Gen Z in Alabama are taking a step back from them. A whopping 96.43% of Alabamians are ditching dating apps and seeking out more personal alternatives for many reasons. Across America, states such as California and Arizona have a 100% dissatisfaction rate for dating apps. There are many alternatives that this generation is exploring, the most common being meeting in person.
Over 70% of Gen Z in Alabama prefer to meet in person, whether it is in a store, at a concert or through friends or at parties, this method seems to be prevalent and working. I will say that I also have friends that have met their significant other either through mutual friends or in a class, and they seem happier than those on dating apps.
While I don’t have much to say about online dating, I do have some on meeting in person. To me, meeting in person seems to leave both parties knowing that they both have genuine interest in each other, causing less confusion in their relationship.
I can also say that meeting someone in person can lead you to finding someone you’d like to be with long term. My parents met in person — even though they can’t tell me exactly how they met — and got married in 1990, and they’ve been together since. Thirty-four years of marriage might be something this generation might not see due to high divorce rates, but getting off dating apps seems to be a step in the right direction.
Felecia and Stephen Brooks: October 1989 | Contributed by Felecia Brooks
Felecia and Stephen Brooks: November 2023 | Contributed by Felecia Brooks
My mom has told me that “prayer and patience” are what have gotten her through being married, which really checks out. She’s been through ups and downs with my dad, as most people do in relationships, and nothing has managed to separate them thus far. Realistically, I think they’ve set an example of what genuine love looks like, and they prove that dating apps aren’t always needed to find “your person.”
Meeting in the age before the internet might also be a key as to why they’ve been together this long, since one of them had the social skills to make a good move. This is not to imply that our generation doesn’t have these social skills, but we definitely don't have to use them as much, not to mention skills and confidence being lost during quarantine.
To those dating and thinking about giving up because you haven’t found “your person,” I think taking a step back and seeking people in person might be beneficial. I know saying things like “it comes when you least expect it” can be corny, but you never know who you’d end up with if you stop playing games of hot or not on apps.
Finding a true connection might not seem feasible, especially when you're young and see the good in all people. However, I encourage you to be patient, just as my mom has told me. Looking in the right place is also a big step in finding someone worthwhile, so don't be afraid to take a step back from dating online.
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Brychelle Brooks, junior majoring in public and professional writing with a minor in information systems, has been with The Auburn Plainsman since August 2023. She previously served as the Campus Reporter and Opinion Editor. She is currently serving as the Newsletter Editor.
