Long distance relationships are difficult no matter what the circumstances are. However, that difficulty can be multiplied when one member of the relationship is in the military.
Despite struggles, some couples have managed to overcome the obstacles and make their relationships work.
Allison DiVicino, senior in psychology, and Emily Kreh, freshman in elementary education, are in relationships with members of the military.
“It takes a special relationship, and a special kind of person to make it,” DiVicino said.
DiVicino said she and her boyfriend Vincent Manganello, who have known each other since they were 12 years old, have been dating for almost a year and half.
At the end of their high school years, DiVicino said they went their separate ways, but rekindled two years ago when Manganello sent her a message on Facebook. A month later she flew out to his Marine Corps base in Jacksonville, North Carolina.
DiVicino said their relationship has worked well because Manganello was, fortunately, never deployed.
“I was lucky he never got deployed while we were together, because I couldn’t imagine him being in a war zone for both his safety and not getting to talk to him,” DiVicino said.
Manganello spent time in Virginia, North Carolina and South Carolina, but because he tore his ACL the first year of training, he never went anywhere else.
According to DiVicino, Manganello joined the Marine Corps to go to Afghanistan, and never got to because of paperwork and his injury.
Manganello was recently released because of his injury as well. However, DiVicino said he could be called back at any time if he was needed.
Another aspect that has helped the relationship, DiVicino said, is FaceTime. On nights the couple could be together, they talked on FaceTime, and have even set up their cameras and watched Netflix together over the computer.
“You take what you can get,” DiVicino said.
On top of FaceTime dates, DiVicino and Manganello would see each other fairly often. Manganello would drive nine and a half hours on Fridays once a month to see DiVicino, and leave on Sundays.
“The worst part is having to drive 18 hours in a weekend just for a day together,” Manganello said.
DiVicino said while the distance and the not knowing are difficult, the time spent with Manganello and watching his passion for what he does makes the relationship worth it.
Similarly, Kreh and her fiancé Jerred Smith, who have been engaged for six months, have faced difficulties in their relationship.
Kreh and Smith have been dating for three years, and according to Kreh, hit a hurdle last month when Smith left for basic training for the Army.
Smith will be in basic training in Missouri for nine weeks, and then Advanced Individual Training (AIT) in Texas for five weeks.
Because Smith is in basic training, he and Kreh have only been able to communicate by letters.
Kreh said her letters to Smith have been random because they do not correspond with his, but she usually just tells him the details of her day.
“It helps to act like I’m just talking to him at the end of the day,” Kreh said.
To help with the lack of communication, Smith wrote out phrases he said daily on strips of paper before he left, and put them in a mason jar for Kreh to draw a new one each day.
Despite the absence of communication, Kreh and Smith are planning to get married next September. However, this could change, Kreh said.
After his training and AIT, Smith will move on to airborne school, followed by active duty. Kreh said because of this, if the wedding is not quick enough, it will have to be postponed because he could be deployed to Korea for two years.
While the situation is frustrating, Kreh also said the relationship is worth it because her fiancé is doing what he loves.
“I love seeing him happier than he’s ever been, and I know he’s doing this for himself,” Kreh said.
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