She remembers certain days in kindergarten, when it was just "me and mom," heading out of school early, placing out the china for tea parties and watching "I Love Lucy" on repeat.
Lauren Calvert said memories like these are the ones she'll hold on to the most after her mother's long, tiresome battle against breast cancer ended earlier this month.
"She fought the good fight and kept her faith the entire time," Lauren, senior in human development and family studies, said. "The 21 years we had together is better than 50 or 60 years that other people can have with their mom."
Lauren's mother, Tammy Calvert, passed away Tuesday, Oct. 2.
During the months of endless treatment and surgeries, Lauren said her mother never became angry or ever asked, "why me?" out of frustration, stating no matter how her story ended, Tammy would give God all the glory.
"She knew it was God's plan, and with everything that got thrown at her, she just said 'OK,'" Lauren said. "Even if she was hurting on the inside, we'd never know. She wanted to protect our family."
Although Tammy was diagnosed with breast cancer Feb. 14, 2011, Lauren first knew March 5, 2011.
"She contacted Emily Riley, one of my best friends from high school, to find out my test schedule," Lauren said. "She was always thinking of everyone before herself."
March 2011 began the 20 months of chemotherapy, radiation and surgeries, starting with a double mastectomy. Tammy's cancer was ductal carcinoma in situ, which is triple negative, meaning estrogen, progesterone and her-2 receptor negative, which requires a more specific, rare type of chemotherapy.
Lauren said the doctors found a sentinel node, and after testing an envelope of 15 nodes, each was found positive.
"We knew that this meant there was a very good chance that it could spread, and that it also meant more aggressive chemo and radiation," Lauren said. "A lot of people think breast cancer is cookie-cutter, but Mom's was more like a wildcard. You didn't know what was going to happen, so we just had to pray."
In her few weeks to recover from surgery, Lauren said Tammy still happily attended her brother Matthew's baseball games "with her drain still poking out of her outfits -- but we glamorized them, just to make it better."
With chemotherapy came Tammy's loss of hair, and with a need for a wig came Bridget.
"We began the days of Bridget the wig, and we had to get the wig just right for Easter Sunday," Lauren said. "She never missed church. She was a 'Jesus calling' fan, and that was something that helped her through every day."
The remainder of the chemotherapy and radiation ended in December 2011, yet in February, Tammy began to have headaches again.
"Feb. 14 now has a new meaning," Lauren said. "It's no longer a loving holiday to us."
Those headaches were caused by a lemonsized tumor found in Tammy's brain, and after many prayers, Tammy decided to have a full craniotomy.
"After surgery, she was sitting up in a chair and saying 'everything is just perfect,'" Lauren said. "That was her main word. It was all perfect, no matter what. People would bring her food, and 'oh, it was perfect.'"
Instead of heading home to rest after surgery, Lauren said Tammy went straight to the ballpark to see Matthew play baseball.
"She never stopped, and I don't know how she did it," Lauren said. "From the time we were young, she never missed a single dance recital or cheerleading competition or baseball game."
After a partial hip replacement in June and more chemotherapy in July, Tammy returned to work at Trinity Medical Center in Birmingham, where she had been a nurse for 28 years.
"From the custodians to the administration, everyone knew who she was," Lauren said. "She's very good at what she does, and she loved it."
On her second day back at work, Tammy fell and broke her femur. She was in the hospital for 17 days after her femur surgery, and her health began declining.
She returned to the emergency room late September, and on Friday, Sept. 28, Tammy returned home to be surrounded by her family.
Lauren, Matthew, Lauren's father Dennis Calvert and sisters Ashley Davis and Meagan Calvert were "blessed with the time to laugh and reminisce on good times."
"It was a great last day, and we were able to say 'I love you' about 500,000 times," Lauren said. "We just loved to tell her that."
More than 1,500 friends and family members came to celebrate Tammy's life at Northpark Baptist Church in Birmingham Oct. 5. Lauren said the pastor compared her to the Proverbs 31 woman, which "is exactly who she is."
"I got to hold her when she took her last breath, and she was holding me when I took my first," Lauren said. "There's something beautiful in that, even though selfishly I want her to be here. God loves her more than I ever could, which is hard for me to imagine."
Throughout Tammy's entire diagnosis and treatments, friends such as Linda McAllister made Tammy a story page on CaringBridge.com and a Facebook page called "365 for Tammy Calvert," designed for anyone to post their random acts of kindness in honor of Tammy.
"My family has grown together through this experience, and my dad was so great to my sweet momma from day one of this journey," Lauren said.
Oct. 15 marks the 25th anniversary of Tammy and Dennis' marriage, and "they are a true testament of what it means to love each other through good times and bad, through sickness and health," Lauren said.
Lauren said she hopes all will remember her mother's selfless spirit, as "a sweet friend told me something that I will never forget. Cancer did not define her, Jesus did. If Mom can change just one person's life, she would be happy."
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